Child Logic

John: "Okay, it’s bedtime. Time to quiet down and read our bedtime book. You must put away the horse-weapon and the box-weapon."

Juss to Orville, one tenth of a second later: "Okay. We pretend I have the box-weapon and you have the horse-weapon."

So, what about you guys? What have your kids been saying lately (or your nephews or your favorite neighbor under the age of twelve?)

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28 thoughts on “Child Logic

  1. Not so much words, but Ben has been making a careful list of Christmas presents to give his relatives, based on the selection of gifts available at the school shop.
    It’s good for math.
    It’s not so good for the house.
    “Dear, is there some reason you moved the bed?”

    Not me. No, twas Santa’s helper trying to come up with some more change for his presents.

    On Saturday, when we were perplexed that none of the “good” ornaments seemed to be in the big green Christmas box, Ben reminded us of the “red box” I had packed LAST JANUARY.
    I had, too. Carefully packed the good stuff and forgotten all about it. Steve declared that finding it so quickly afterward was truly a Christmas miracle.

    • Wow…good memory on Ben’s part! I love his devotion to helping Santa.

      We’re beginning to discover that the Cherubim has a good memory and remembers when we go somewhere what he did there last time. We had a funny moment related to this on the trip to Monticello.

      John: “There’s a Subway. Should we stop there for lunch?”
      Me: “No. The kids won’t enjoy it.”
      Cherubim: “Subway.”
      John: “Let’s stop! He wants to eat there.”
      Me: “No. He doesn’t like sandwiches. He thinks you mean the subway, like he traveled on in New York. He wants to go on a train.”

      We should take the two boys on the Metro.

  2. My god-daughter, aged 2 1/2, has just learned to sing Jingle Bells. :)

    Best friend (mother of the child): Lucy, you know lots of songs, can you sing ‘Jesus Loves Me’?

    Lucy: *intense thoughtful gaze, then at full volume* JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS!!

    :)

    Oh, and another one… Her mother was teaching her to make the sign of the Cross, and carefully saying, “In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. Now, can you say that back?”

    Lucy concentrated for a moment, and said carefully, “Father…Son…Grandma?”

  3. Not so much words, but Ben has been making a careful list of Christmas presents to give his relatives, based on the selection of gifts available at the school shop.
    It’s good for math.
    It’s not so good for the house.
    “Dear, is there some reason you moved the bed?”

    Not me. No, twas Santa’s helper trying to come up with some more change for his presents.

    On Saturday, when we were perplexed that none of the “good” ornaments seemed to be in the big green Christmas box, Ben reminded us of the “red box” I had packed LAST JANUARY.
    I had, too. Carefully packed the good stuff and forgotten all about it. Steve declared that finding it so quickly afterward was truly a Christmas miracle.

  4. My god-daughter, aged 2 1/2, has just learned to sing Jingle Bells. :)

    Best friend (mother of the child): Lucy, you know lots of songs, can you sing ‘Jesus Loves Me’?

    Lucy: *intense thoughtful gaze, then at full volume* JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS!!

    :)

    Oh, and another one… Her mother was teaching her to make the sign of the Cross, and carefully saying, “In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. Now, can you say that back?”

    Lucy concentrated for a moment, and said carefully, “Father…Son…Grandma?”

  5. A while ago, I took my cousin (eight or so at the time?) to get ice cream… She ordered vanilla, I ordered cotton candy ice cream. When I ordered, she turned around and gave me the most horrified look I’d ever seen on her face.

    “What? What’s wrong?
    “Cotton Candy? That’s not an adult flavor!”

  6. Wow…good memory on Ben’s part! I love his devotion to helping Santa.

    We’re beginning to discover that the Cherubim has a good memory and remembers when we go somewhere what he did there last time. We had a funny moment related to this on the trip to Monticello.

    John: “There’s a Subway. Should we stop there for lunch?”
    Me: “No. The kids won’t enjoy it.”
    Cherubim: “Subway.”
    John: “Let’s stop! He wants to eat there.”
    Me: “No. He doesn’t like sandwiches. He thinks you mean the subway, like he traveled on in New York. He wants to go on a train.”

    We should take the two boys on the Metro.

  7. A while ago, I took my cousin (eight or so at the time?) to get ice cream… She ordered vanilla, I ordered cotton candy ice cream. When I ordered, she turned around and gave me the most horrified look I’d ever seen on her face.

    “What? What’s wrong?
    “Cotton Candy? That’s not an adult flavor!”

  8. Psh. I like cotton candy and I like ice cream. What can be better?

    Well, mostly, things with with chocolate. But sometimes cotton candy ice cream is pretty kickin’.

  9. Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. But, frankly, I must confess that cotton candy flavor kind of scares me. I often resist giving it to my kids because I can’t imagine how it’s made…of course the berry flavors are probably just chemicals, too…so I’m just fooling myself.

  10. I should add that while I do think of it as a kids flavor…I don’t think there’s anything wrong with adults likeing kids flavors, or books, or cartoons, etc. ;-)

    On the other hand, I’ve recently begun to get tired of the idolization of immaturity that our culture seems to have. Guys in their 40s I know still revel in being immature. Nothing wrong with being an adult who likes kids stuff…but that’s not the same as not being an adult. ;-)

  11. Got another cute one from my god-daughter. Apparently, she’s picking up on the Nativity story, but being only 2 1/2, she doesn’t QUITE get it yet…

    It seems she was playing with her Fisher-Price nativity set, and told her mom that the cow was going to have a baby and name it Jesus… I’ll give her credit, she knows that someone there had a baby, and there’s always a cow in Nativity scenes… :)

  12. Got another cute one from my god-daughter. Apparently, she’s picking up on the Nativity story, but being only 2 1/2, she doesn’t QUITE get it yet…

    It seems she was playing with her Fisher-Price nativity set, and told her mom that the cow was going to have a baby and name it Jesus… I’ll give her credit, she knows that someone there had a baby, and there’s always a cow in Nativity scenes… :)

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