Not having is not the same as removing

This is a test post for working out the website/LJ process..

But because I have to type something:

I have noticed that my daughter is inundated with Chinese things: Chinese grocery stores, Chinese TV, Jackie Chan in Chinese on DVD.

Sometimes, I wonder if she would be better off if there was less. If she had just been immersed in American culture cold turkey. When I comment on this people say, “Why don’t you just not let her go there/watch that.”


But not having something is VERY DIFFERENT than being denied it. If I deny it, then Mom is deliberately taking away something that brings her joy, and it is not clear to her why. This is entirely different from if it had not been there. If it was not there, I would not need to do anything. To explain to her why I am taking away something that matters to her is quite a different thing, quite different indeed.